A bike on the road is worth two in the shed.
In researching what constitutes a real biker, I came across a quiz
“R U a real biker” put together by a fellow named Mongo Jones.
Some interesting points can be derived from this quiz.
The first question is: What is your age?
I didn’t realize that to be a biker required an age limitation. You don’t have to wait to get to a certain age to be a biker; it is what you are from the beginning. Some people realize this at a very early age while others; don’t catch on till it is too late.
Society frowns on individuals who do not fit the mold that the rulemakers have created. Some people are brainwashed into conforming to the “Norm”. Breaking the mold comes at different times for different people. Some never get in, others break it at different ages, while some never get out.
The second question is: What is your gender?
At one time this would not even have been a question. Women were considered as mamas, a house mouse, ol lady, or even a wife. They weren’t allowed to participate except in games at the field days. They rode on the back and even if they could ride a bike, they weren’t allowed to do so in Club company.
Now, it seems that there are a lot of women riders, as well as women only clubs.
I have personally known some women who fit the term biker as well as most men and more than many that deem themselves as such.
The third question is: Complete this sentence... “Live to Ride,
I seems to me that anyone even remotely aware of the biker culture would know the answer to that one.
The fourth question: If someone says, "You'll need a lid in West Virginia", they're talking about... a helmet
This is another general question that you don’t need to be a biker to answer, although there are some that would not know what a West Virginia is.
5. "A Knucklehead is ... A Harley motor
This is history. A true biker would know this, as well as how to identify the parts. But todays biker is not interested in history, nor are they riding something that they would be able to fix if it broke down on the road. The industry in all it’s wisdom & greed has evolved the motorcycle into something that must be taken to a dealership to be repaired so that the bottom line may be increased. The bleeding heart rulemakers & do gooders keep making it increasingly harder to modify a bike to your specifications which would make it an extension to your soul.
6. Complete this sentence... " Show us your... tits.
While this was once a biker saying, it would seem that everyone is utilizing it from college kids to car clubs.
7. "Laconia & Sturgis are... towns that hold annual bike rallies".
Commercialism has destroyed most of the big events like these. If you are in the United States, there is probably somewhere you can go every weekend. In Canada there is lots of events, but the Police gang are trying their best to stop this practice.
8. "When riding in a group & the leader spots a policeman, he should...
tap the top of his head to warn others to slow down
I presume that this was the right answer as whenever I am in a group, either there is a police escort, or it is so unorganized that no one seems to be in charge, as the chargers want to see how fast they can get to where the group is going & the ones that don’t break down or crash enjoy the ride at a reasonable speed while watching the unlucky chargers sit on the side of the road getting tickets.
At one time when a club went on a run there were strict rules to follow & penalties if you didn’t follow them.
9. "The apparatus that holds up the bike when parked is called a... jiffy stand
This is also called a side stand, but anyone who travels on two wheels, powered or not should know this.
10. "The apparatus that keeps your bike from falling over when parked is called...
a jiffy stand".
Hmmm..... didn’t he just do that?
11. Complete this sentence... "This bee-yatch doesn't... fall off'.
To me this is not biker language, it is rapper speak, spoken by those who wish to belong to a species that they were not born to.
12. " Ape hangers are... handlebars
Seems to be common knowledge.
13. "I rode mine means... I rode my bike instead of puttin' it on a trailer".
This relates to all the posers who attend the biker events with a bike, usually a Harley on trailer to show that they own one. Most of these guys can’t ride anyway, and the bike never leaves the trailer.
14. "If you ride without a windshield, you might eat... bugs
This is a matter of taste, some people like bugs.
15. "The HELL'S ANGELS are ... a motorcycle gang or a motorcycle club
This is a matter of opinion.
16. " Sometimes, when the OUTLAWS, HELL'S ANGELS, or PAGANS cross paths, someone... ends up hurt or dead
To take from the Highlander movie “There can be only one!”
17. If you have some nice ink, it means... you have tattoos
I don’t see how this knowledge makes you a biker.
18. "Road rash is... scrapes & scabs that you get when you crash
This relates to bikers, but also, bicycles, skateboards, roller skates, etc.
19. "It's not the destination, it's... the adventure".
Going on a motorcycle trip used to be an adventure, but not so much anymore.
Bikes were not as dependable as they are now. There was always the chance of a breakdown and cell phones were not the norm. Today you just get on the rolling couch, set the cruise, turn on the tunes & the modern high speed highways get you there in no time flat. Just like being in a car.
The weather was always a major factor because the forecasters didn’t have all the modern equipment, like it does them any good, so you didn’t know the long range forecast. Traveling on two lane highways with little idea of what you might run into around the next bend always increased the excitement.
20. "A bagger is... a type of motorcycle
This is something related to biker knowledge.
21. "Panhead - Shovelhead - Ironhead "... These are types of... bike motors
Also related to biker knowledge
22. Number of bikers that show up at Sturgis each year... 500,000 +
I suppose that a real biker would be aware of this knowledge.
23. "An old Harley is most known for... dripping oil
Part of the nostalgia.
24. "A Twin Cam Harley motor is cooled via... air".
A better question would be “Which Harley is liquid cooled?”
25. "Daytona is... a biker destination".
A well known fact.
26. "Chaps are... leather pants
Also worn by cowboys, who normally dislike bikers.
27. "A Harley motor has... 2 cylinders
If he was talking about an old Harley motor, I could have picked - a mind of it's own, which was one of the choices because I have had a few to were like that.
28. " Leather bags are... bike compartments for carrying supplies".
Another cowboy accessory, & I think women have them too.
29. " You should only change your oil when..
I didn’t see a suitable answer for this question as nothing he suggested fit. Any real biker treats a bike with respect & knows that the oil needs changing on a regular basis.
30. ' Milwaukee Iron is... a term that applies to Harley motorcycles".
The home of the most famous of the American Motorcycles.
31. "To STAGGER when riding in a group, you ... leave space between bikes for unexpected hazards".
This is normal for today with so many inexperienced riders, but older clubs used to ride in a tight formation because in order to belong you had to know how to ride a motorcycle.
32. ' The most popular type of riding jacket is... leather".
This is also an old skool habit, although some still do, alot seem to have changed to Kevlar with armor plates, and other materials that are supposed to breathe better, give better protection and weigh less.
33. " Loud pipes save... lives
This is a highly debated point, even among bikers.
34. "The right lever on the handlebar is usually for... stopping".
Something that maybe only a biker would know, but I think bicycles have the same lever.
35. " A Fat Boy is... a Harley model ".
I hope he meant the bike.
36. " A womans' collection of beads is directly related to...
I didn’t know this question. I have never seen the reference before.
37. " Helmet laws... suck".
This is true.
38. " Put a 600 pound _____ between your legs". Vibrator
I hope that he was referring to a biker pick up line. The only males I would imagine wanting a vibrator between their leg bat for the other side.
39. In the movie "EASY RIDER", Peter Fonda rode a... chopper".
Anyone who goes to the movies should know that one.
40. "Also in EASY RIDER, Jack Nicholson wore a... football helmet
Unless you were a sports fan, you might not know this.
41. " A biker's woman is his.. Old lady
Lots of guys use this & they are not all bikers.
42. " A HOG is a... a big Harley
The term is so common, anybody should know this.
I only got 98% on this.
So I guess that I am not a 100% biker.
I found another quiz, which we will look at tomorrow.
Till then - 'Hang in There' ..... J D Redneck
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